Quality of Parent-Toddler Relationship Linked with Childhood Obesity

A recent article suggests that the quality of parent-toddler relationships could affect children's risk for obesity...what?! Sounds crazy, doesn't it? Let me explain.

In this fascinating study, the authors looked at the attachment relationship between parents and children. The attachment relationship is a special bond between parents and children. In short, it's based on the consistency with which you respond to your child- do you comfort her when she's upset? Do you pick him up when those precious arms are reaching for you? Do you snuggle her when she's sick? All of these behaviors foster the attachment relationship and send the following message to your child: "My parent will be there for me when I need her/him." They become securely attached.

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Parent of the Week: Tracy

Okay, you guys are just going to love this. This week's Parent of the week is Tracy. She is the mom of four (love it!) and was nominated by her husband (LOVE IT!). She blogs over at My Crazy 4 and she's just all around awesome. Enjoy!

As always, if you'd like to be a Parent of the Week or would like to nominate someone, email me at deluna.jamie@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from you!

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^{Tell me a little about you- Who are you? What do you do? Hobbies? Do you dance in the car?}

^{My name is Tracy and I live in West Georgia and I have been married for almost 11 years to my wonderful husband Scott. We have 4 awesome children. I am a breastfeeding, baby wearing, cloth diapering organic loving, home schooling mom. I home school my two older boys in the K-12 program. My biggest accomplishment so far is teaching the boys how to read. I love to blog even though it is hard to find the time to do it as often as I like. I am an avid coupon clipper and I take every chance I can to save some money. And no, I do not dance in the van, but I do sing Barney and Imagination Movers songs.}

^{Tell me about your children.}

^{I have three boys and a girl. My son Carson is seven and he is so much like his daddy. He’s very sweet , sensitive and caring. He loves to read, draw and play legos. Cain is five and he is alot like me. He’s our strong willed, knows what he wants, and never backs down kind of boy. He loves the computer and is very smart. Carly, my daughter is four and she is my little princess who does a great job of keeping up with her brothers. She loves to learn, do everything herself and help out around the house. Camlin is 19 months and he is the climber of the family. He loves to take naps while in the Ergo back carrier. He is still nursing, and definitely a momma’s boy. They were all born on a Wednesday, and their birthdays are every 3 months-March~ June~ September~ December (3-6-9-12). I’m a big planner.}

^{What surprised you most about parenting?}

^{When I first got married I did not want children at all. I know crazy, huh? I think what has surprised me the most about parenting is how much the kids would teach me about things. I think we learn from our children as much as they learn from us. Even though sometimes it takes us awhile to figure that out. I also had no idea that I would become such a passionate parent about things such as breastfeeding, attachment parenting, baby wearing, non vaccinating and eating organically. I do wish I would have started cloth diapering sooner.}

^{How have you had to be Avant Garde as a parent?}

^{Well with four children that are so different from one another I have had to learn to use different parenting styles. We are not all the same and neither are our children. I have come to find out that I can use examples from different books I have read and implemented the styles and mesh them together. My favorite is  “Love and Logic”. Everyday is not going to be the same. Each day brings a new challenge and I am learning to adapt to that and take it as it comes. The main thing is that I will love my children and try to show them that mistakes will be made and it is ok. Move on. Have fun and enjoy every minute of them because they grow up fast.}

^{Thank you Jamie for allowing me to be Parent of the Week! And to my wonderful husband who thinks I should always be Parent of the Week. Love you honey.} 

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^{Tracy and Past Parents of the Week: Feel free to grab the Parent of the Week Badge:}

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To Cosleep or Not- That is the Question

Cosleeping. It’s a topic that’s gained more and more attention in the last few years, and one that tends to split parents into opposing opinion camps. While some parents cannot imagine the thought of sharing their marital bed with their little ones, other couples can’t fathom turning their children away from the nighttime comfort of mom and dad’s snuggles. Here’s a brief primer along with a few commonly asked questions about cosleeping. It’s meant to be an informative snapshot about the topic and I hope you find it helpful.

What exactly is cosleeping?

One myth about cosleeping is that it is exclusively parent and child sharing a bed. However, bedsharing is only one type of cosleeping. In fact, cosleeping, a tenant of attachment parenting, refers to the practice of parents and children sleeping in close proximity to one another. There are many ways for parents and children can cosleep:

• Infant Cosleepers- Special bassinets that attach to the side of your bed. They allow your baby to be in close reach while keeping your infant on a firm, safe surface separate from your bed.
• Bedsharing- Children and parents share the same bed. Most medical experts do not recommend this way of cosleeping for infants because of the risk of soft mattresses, blankets, parents rolling over on the baby, etc.
• Room sharing- Keeping your child’s bed or bassinet in the same room as yours without explicitly sleeping in the same bed.

Is cosleeping safe to do with my infant?

The answer appears to be yes, when practiced safely. For parents of infants, medical experts recommend sleeping on a separate surface from your baby, whether in a co-sleeper that attaches adjacently to your bed or the baby sleeping in a bassinet in the same room.

Neither the American Academy of Pediatrics nor the US Consumer Product Safety Commission endorse direct bedsharing with infants. However, many parents still choose to have their baby sleep in the same bed with them. Dr. Sears provides a guide to safe bedsharing if this is your choice.


What about bedsharing with my older child?
Safe? Absolutely! Always make sure your child's head is not covered with blankets and that your child is not too warm or too cold. 

Cosleeping and children’s independence

Some child experts argue that cosleeping past the age of two can hinder a child’s independence. In the one study I have seen that examined these issues, the results were quite interesting and the interpretation really depends on how you yourself define ‘independence.’ Children who did not cosleep were more independent in that they were able to fall asleep alone and could return to sleep without parental soothing. But, interestingly, mothers who coslept with their preschoolers from the time they were infants reported that their children were slightly more self-reliant than did mothers of solitary sleeping children or reactive cosleeping children (children who started off the night in their own beds and end up in mom and/or dad’s bed). What does self-reliance mean? Things like dressing yourself, working out playmate problems on your own, etc.

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Why? The authors found that parents of cosleeping children consistently encouraged these skills in their children and speculate that these parents allow their children to participate in decisions about where to sleep, which may foster their self-reliance skills.

Does this mean that if you don’t cosleep with your child he or she won’t be self-reliant? NO. All parents foster independence and self-reliance in their children in different ways and through different means. Cosleeping is just one way. All I’m trying to illustrate is that different things work for different families.

So how do I decide whether to cosleep or not?

This is one of those (many) parenting issues where there’s really not a right answer. You have to feel out what’s right for your family. The fact that you’re even reading this article and informing yourself on cosleeping speaks volumes about you as a parent- you’re concerned, conscientious, and going to make the best decision for you and your child. Feel it out as you go- anchor and adjust along the way. I’m confident in your abilities and you should be, too!




Reference: Keller, M. A. & Goldberg, W. A. (2004). Co-sleeping: Help or hindrance for young children's independence? Infant and child development, 13, 369-388.

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Handing Separation Anxiety With Your Preschooler

Separation anxiety can end up causing anxiety for both parent and child. For many moms and dads of young children, morning drop off at school or day care can end in tears for both the child and the parent. Here are some tips for a tear-free morning- every morning.

Have special toys that live in the car

Sometimes the toughest morning transition is getting your child out of the house and into the car. Shaking the ‘But I don’t wanna go to school’ blues can be hard, and hearing your child whine every. single. morning. can really test your patience. Try having a few special toys that ‘live in the car,’ and thus can only be played with while your child is riding in the car.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “But what if my child throws a tantrum on the way home because she likes the toys so much and wants to take them inside and play with them?” Well, there are a few different options. First, you can be a really good marketer. If the toys who live in the car are, say, stuffed animals, maybe they go to sleep every time your child isn’t in the car playing with them and you act out a short (30 seconds) bedtime scenario as each car ride is coming to an end. This gives your child closure until the next car ride. Alternatively, you could choose toys that must stay in the car, like an activity set that attaches to your child’s car seat.

Know that your child will likely be fine

It’s true, what the care providers tell you- it is usually harder on the parents. Children usually do calm down fairly quickly after you leave. I know it’s not fun or easy, but trust that you’ve left your child in good hands. And know this- if you pick up a smiling, happy child, she’s probably had a pretty good day J


These are just a few quick tips to helping your child overcome separation anxiety!

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Parenting Quick Challenge: Bedtime Rituals

When I was young, my mom and I had this bedtime ritual. We did it every night without fail. At the risk of you thinking we were crazy (we were, a little), here's what it was: I would stand on my bed facing my mother, which put me at roughly at the same height as her. We had a little made up song and dance that we did. It lasted maybe ten seconds, max. It involved fist and elbow swinging along with just a tad of hip swaying. I won't sing you the song but suffice it to say that it was silly. Each night after said production, I jumped into the lying position to receive my bedtime story and 'wind down' (one terrible, fateful night, this 'jump' involved me breaking my thumb. That is another post entirely.).


The point is: I'm now twenty-seven years old a grown adult and I still remember it. Even the song. It was 'our thing.' For me as a child, it was predictable. I knew I could count on it as a part of my bedtime routine. It was comforting. Even if I had had a rotten day, singing and dancing with my mom ended it on a good note (get it?! note?! I really should go into comedy...). And it connected me with my mom. I could call my mother up this second and she could sing the song to me. 


Here's the challenge: Create a special bedtime ritual with your child. It does not need to be a full out stage production, just something quick and special that helps you and your child have a special moment at the end of each day. Here are a few ideas:

• Have special bedtime words, for example: "Goodnight, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite, and if they do then smack 'em, smack 'em, smack 'em right!"
• Talk about your favorite thing that happened during the day
• Talk about what you're looking forward to about tomorrow

What did you come up with? Do you already do this? Tell me about it!

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Bedtime Woes

Do you dread your child’s bedtime? Does your kiddo coerce you to lay in bed with him until he falls asleep (which takes 3 hours because he wills himself to stay awake)? Does she wake up eleventy times during the night, wanting each time to get in bed with you? Do you wake up in the morning feeling like you haven’t slept (because you haven’t)?



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I can only imagine how frustrated you are because I’m fairly certain I was that child for my parents. I used to make one of my parents sit by my bed until I fell asleep. Then, I would make myself stay awake because I thought, “Well, if I just stay awake, mom won’t leave because she said she stay until I’m asleep.” I literally have a memory of my father reading through the entire newspaper next to my bed. When I was a bit older, I used to make myself stay awake all night because I was so scared of being alone at night in my room. To this day, I have no idea why I was so scared. I ended up co-sleeping with my parents (much to their dismay) until I was about 10- and I think it lasted so long because I knew I was in charge of the situation and could manipulate it to my satisfaction.

Wanting to control a situation is extremely common in children, even very young ones. If we’re being honest, it’s common in people of all ages. I personally always recommend parents helping their children to feel in control of their world. I think about it in terms of trying to find a way to say ‘yes’ instead of ‘no.’ (did you see my post on letting your child have control in appropriate ways?) For children especially, the things they want control over may seem silly or trivial, but, for many things, if it’s not hurting them or someone else, why not? Plus, letting them have control in lots of little situations often leads to less resistance when you need to control other situations.

Bedtime is no different:

• Let her choose the jammies
• Let him choose which bedtime story to read
• Let her say goodnight to her toys
• Let him choose a special stuffed animal to sleep with each night

So what about the problems after the lights are out? From a developmental point of view, many times, 'sleeping' problems in children have less to do with sleep and more to do with what we researchers call 'goodness of fit,' which is a fancy way of saying that there may be something(s) in his environment that doesn't work for him and it manifests in the form of a problem at bedtime. That is, the symptom of a bedtime problem may be due to something completely different than bedtime. (So, for example, a child may crave more 'mom' time during the day and acting out at bedtime is a way of getting that attention.)

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Where the ‘goodness of fit’ for bedtime comes in is finding a solution that works for both of you- finding a compromise by which both parties are feeling like their needs are met. Some children may need to have a parent close to them while they’re sleeping, whether at the beginning of the night or after nighttime wakings. Try making a bed of blankets with a pillow at the end of mom and dad’s bed. During the night, if she wakes up, she can come sleep on that with the understanding that she must be quiet or else she goes back to her own room. This will fulfill her need of having a parent close by and also teach her to self-sooth. More importantly, it might give her a sense of control for handling this problem on her own.

Now, I completely expect her to violate the ‘quiet’ rule a few (or many) times. I would attempt to battle that with the following: take her back to her bed and tell her she can come back to the pallet when she is ready, but the quiet rule still applies.

Here are some other ideas:

• Routine. Routine. Routine. Have one. Stick to it.

• Bedtime checklist. Not a reward chart, just a checklist, so that your kiddo knows exactly what to expect each night. Checking bedtime tasks (tooth brushing, bath, etc) will help her feel more in control.
• Hear what she’s saying. Be there for her, but help her regulate. “I hear that you don’t want to go to bed. Can I snuggle next to you to help you feel better or can you work it out on your own?”
• Bedtime guidelines like talking in a whisper or a soft voice for 30 minutes before bed will help him ‘put on the brakes’ and calm down.

Good luck, parents, as you battle bedtime. As in all matters child, I know that it is easier said than done. I hope that this provides some help and insight.

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Be Flexible: Bend Without Breaking

One of the hardest things about marriage (for me) is realizing and accepting that your spouse can have a completely different opinion about something…and it’s okay. It’s easy to agree- you feel connected to the person because you share similar viewpoints. It’s also fun sometimes to disagree- it sparks interesting and lively conversation. But when you disagree about something you’re passionate about, it can be infuriating and really difficult to step back and think, ‘Okay, he has his opinion. It’s not wrong. It doesn’t make him a bad person. It’s just different than mine.’

Surprise! This happens with kids, too. You are dying for her to wear the new dress you bought her for school pictures. She wants to wear an old t-shirt. You know he’d just love t-ball if he’d give it a chance, but he’s deadset on soccer.

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So what do you do? You want to let her have choices, but you also want to maintain your role as the parent and leader. Here’s something I learned from a (genius) mom friend: be flexible. Let her wear the old t-shirt. Let him try soccer. Be flexible. It can be so hard but I promise it will be worth it.

Try it like this: “You know what? I can be flexible about what you wear for your school pictures. You pick what you want to wear. I will need to comb your hair and brush your teeth really well the morning of pictures, though.” This allows your child to practice independence while also setting boundaries on the non-negotiables.

I suggest using the words ‘I can be flexible about that’ when employing this strategy. I have a feeling you will eventually A. Hear your little one telling you that he can ‘be flexible’ about something and B. Hear your little one say, ‘Mommy, can you just be flexible about bedtime/having candy for breakfast/watching tv all day?’

Why be flexible?

• It shows your child that you respect him and that his opinion matters
• It is a great example of having an open-mind and compromising
• It allows your child to feel a sense of accomplishment
• It helps your child learn to be independent
• It teaches your child (by example) to respect other’s opinions
• It helps you to slow down and take in all the options

**UPDATE: BalancingMama (thank you!) made a GREAT point in her comment. Which reminded me of this: If you are flexible with your child on smaller issues (what to wear, what to eat, etc.) she will likely be more accepting when you 'put your foot down' on a more serious issue (safety, bedtime) because she knows that you will say yes when you can. 

Did you try it? It will take several times to kick in/be effective. Give it a week, then let me know how it’s working!

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Avant Garde Parent of the Week: Megan

Megan with Baby P

This is Megan. Megan is a brand new mommy to a sweet little monkey with bright red hair, just like her! Can I just tell you that Megan’s entire labor lasted something like 3.5 hours?! I know, I know, we should hate her. But you can’t because she’s super nice, thoughtful, and funny.

She’s a working mommy but somehow still finds the time and energy to take baby P to swim lessons, story time, grammy & grumps’ house, AND love on her hubby and three dogs. Oh, did I mention that she also blogs?! Megan is my mommy idol. Read on as she talks about how music plays a role in her and baby P’s life. J

"His life is like one big musical," my husband observed after leaving swim class with our 11 week-old son Parker. I would love to say that after 11 weeks we have it all figured out and proceed to tell you the ins and outs of parenthood, but unfortunately I am 100% novice and pretty much flying by the seat of my pants most days...if I can remember to actually put on pants!

One thing, however, that I have observed over these 11 short weeks is how beneficial music can be. We are now at the smiling stage, which I believe solidifies your role as a mother. In that single moment, you are rewarded for all the sleepless nights and crying spells (both by mom and baby) and all of the other challenges that come with being a new parent. Well, my son gets especially smiley when I turn on my iPod (which has now gone from Rhianna to songs about the ABCs) and sing to him- I get a whole different type of interaction. He stares me down, watches my mouth, and eventually breaks into a HUGE smile followed by what I assume is an early attempt at a giggle. These interactions are priceless! I believe this is not only a way to teach him to appreciate music, but also another fun way for him to learn sounds, which will eventually lead to talking.

Swim time!

Our family participates in both a baby swim class and library story time- which center around learning different skills but both encompass music. Each activity comes with a song. Whether it is short or long, silly or informative, when you put it to the tune of "All around the Mulberry Bush" or "Mary had a little lamb", even the simplest of tasks become fun and exciting! Much like AGP discussed about finding ways to make cleaning fun, why not include a song?! If you don't know one off-hand, make one up! The same goes for eating vegetables, scrubbing during bath time, or even during play time! Why not?! Your child doesn't care whether you have a good voice or even if you are on pitch, they just enjoy hearing your voice and acting silly with mommy and/or daddy.

Try it next time you are making dinner with your little one or putting PJs on at bedtime, you never know, it may stick and become a lasting memory for you and your child!

If you would like to be featured as an Avant Garde Parent of the Week or have someone you would like to nominate, please email me at deluna.jamie@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from you!

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Parenting Quick Challenge: I love you

You probably tell your kids you love them all the time (good for you!). Next time you say it, try this little twist: 

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Instead of saying 'I love you,' 


say, 


'I love...' and then fill in the blank with something about your child's personality. 




Then comment and tell me what you said/how your child reacted/how you felt.


I'm excited to hear!



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Avant Garde Parent of the Week: Snapshot from an Attachment Parent

This is Heather. Not only is she the mom of two precious girls, a member of a community dance group, and active in her church, but she is also an uh-maze-ing photographer  (Look at the title of her post- get it?!). Can you say SuperMom??? Heather Attachment Parents her two girls, so I asked her to write about how AP works in her family life. Enjoy and leave Heather some love in the comments! 

When Jamie asked me to write a guest post about attachment parenting I hesitated, because I’m not an expert on the subject, and I’m not perfect…but I finally decided what I could do was share a snapshot of my life as I attachment parent. I can’t promise a professional portrait all polished and beautiful, but I’ll try to do the subject as much justice as I can…

Heather wearing her daughter

Before I go any further, I should explain what I mean by attachment parenting. To me, it’s kind of like viewing your relationship with your child as a duet…being in unity, harmonizing with her.  You’re the stronger partner, so you’re the one doing all the lifts and helping her balance, but it’s a collaborative effort. Dr. Sears has a number of really wonderful articles on the subject that give slightly more down to earth explanations. ;)

I began attachment parenting long before I knew there was a name for it. I’m pretty sure the first conscious choice I made to attachment parent was when my first baby was less than 2 weeks old and my husband and I sat down to watch a movie together.  She was asleep so I set her down, but within about 5 minutes of being away from her I didn’t feel right not having her in my arms when there was no good reason she couldn’t be. I went and picked her up and all 3 of us cuddled as we watched the movie. It felt so right and wonderful to just be physically connected to her.

I instinctively used a number of the attachment tools Dr. Sears describes, nursing on cue, responding sensitively, and carrying her. I didn’t get a good baby carrier until she was 5 months old, and I didn’t realize that co-sleeping is not unsafe until she was about 10 months old, so I got to discover the joys of doing those things with a newborn with my second baby.  Most importantly, I grew to be in tune with both of my children and I refuse to listen to anything that isn’t what I know is best for them and for our family (though, whenever obstacles come up that I’m not sure how to get around, I read, seek advice, and try things that I feel might be good options).

Now, if you took a look at Dr. Sears’ website, you probably noticed that it talks a lot about babies, and a little about toddlers…but this is a blog about preschoolers, so I’d like to take a second and talk about a few practical things I do to continue attachment parenting my 3 year old.

One thing that is probably slightly unconventional but that we both LOVE, is continuing to wear her. There are mornings when she wakes up and really wants me to hold her but I want to get coffee made and need to cut some grapes for my 9 month old to munch on, so letting her ride on my back in a carrier works perfectly. 

She’s quite independent now.  She’ll run off to the other side of the park to play with her friends, or even excitedly go stay at her grandparents for a week at a time, but she also likes to reconnect a lot. It’s her strong connection to me that provides her the security to explore her independence. The main way she reconnects is with physical touch. She’ll sit in my lap while I read to her, hold my hand while we’re sitting at our desks that are side by side, or I’ll simply rest my hand on her shoulder as I’m standing behind her watching her paint. And possibly most beneficial to her of all, we close every night by me or my husband rubbing her back as she falls asleep, and start almost every morning by cuddling in bed for 10 to 20 minutes before we get up.

Heather nursing baby

Another way I connect with her is really more of a way of thinking…Alfie Kohn describes it in Unconditional Parenting as working with your child rather than doing something to your child. So, for example, my preschooler LOVES to swim…and doesn’t like to leave the swimming pool. I could tell her she has to leave and punish her if she doesn’t, and then when we got home I would have a very unhappy child to deal with…but instead, I choose to work with her to help her be able to say goodbye peacefully. I make sure that we do swim as often as possible so that she always knows we’ll be back soon. I give her frequent notices that we’ll have to leave soon once it gets near time to go. I make sure she knows what enjoyable activity we’re leaving the pool to go do. When there are 10 seconds left we count to 10 together (happily, not in a stern or threatening way).  And finally we say goodbye to the swimming pool, the fountain, and the hot tub. None of those things take very much effort from me, but they help her leave happily and easily move on to what we need to do next.

Finally, I just ENJOY having two awesome girls and spending time with them! I don’t think of parenting as enforcing rules, laying down the law, or dictating ordinances. And you want to know a secret? I don’t necessarily even think of it as teaching in the traditional sense, either. As I attachment parent, I’m really just focusing on my relationship with my children, loving them and being caring and compassionate. Along the way, I teach…mostly by doing, and almost always while having fun. Occasionally I have to enforce rules, but here’s another secret…when I’m more busy playing with my girls than worrying about a bunch of rules, the rules that are important aren’t that hard to enforce.

I encourage you to come up with one way you can connect with your child today, and do it! 

More information on Attachment Parenting can be found at http://www.attachmentparenting.org/ Read more...

Attachment – say what?

Attachment was/is my first Psychology love (how cheesy is that?). I remember hearing about the concept and being just enthralled and reading everything I could get my hands on regarding this fabulous phenomenon.

So what is it? Well, attachment in this case refers to the special bond between a parent and child.  As researchers, we think of a child’s attachment to his parent on a semi-continuum of secure/insecure. Secure, of course, is the kind you want. It’s linked with lots of good things like better social skills and closer parent-child relationships. A secure attachment relationship provides a child with feelings of safety, love, and support

Before I tell you more about attachment, listen to me and repeat to yourself: Most children are securely attached to their parents. (Often when I explain attachment to others, they become quite worried that their own child is insecurely attached and doomed for life. 1. Your child is probably not insecure and 2. Even if she is, she would NOT be doomed for life).

Okay.

1. Attachment first starts to develop at around 8-9 months. Ever notice how, at just about this age, your baby starts crying when you leave the room? That’s the attachment system kicking in. J It’s a good thing, I promise.

2. Secure attachment is thought to result from parents who consistently respond to their child’s needs. Does this mean that if you sometimes don’t hear your baby cry or are slow to respond because you are cooking dinner/in the shower/living your life that he will somehow realize that you are the worst mother ever and develop an insecure attachment? Probably. Just kidding. Of course not! Consistent responding just means that you have developed a pattern with your baby and he knows that you will sooth him when he is upset. MOST PARENTS DO THIS NATURALLY.

3. A securely attached child may look like this:

• Cries/becomes upset when you leave the room
• Easily calms when you return
• Looks to you/runs to you when in the presence of a stranger (Ever said ‘hi’ to a kiddo in the grocery store and he immediately looks at mom and puts a hand on her? Attachment system J)
• Easily able to play at a distance from you in new places (mall play area, classroom, friend’s house)
• Calmed more easily by mom/dad (not other adults or strangers) when upset

4. Important: Securely attached children don’t all fit this mold. Securely attached kids come in all varieties- shy, outgoing, vocal, reserved, easily upset, mellow, you name it.

5. Simple ways to foster a secure attachment relationship with your child:

• Respond to your child in a gentle, caring way. Research shows that sensitive responsiveness is associated with the development of secure attachments.
• Use emotion words. Describing how you feel in terms of emotions (happy, sad, frustrated, etc.) helps your child learn to build emotional bonds with others by connecting on a deeper level.
• Spend quality time together. Share a book, play dress up, or make up a story rather than watch television of play video games together. Experiences that require both people to be engaged encourage bonding and learning about each other.
• Practice ‘trust’ activities. Feeding each other or rub lotion on each other’s hands. Such activities encourage trust and help parent and child be ‘in-tune’ with the other.

This is, of course, a very basic introduction to attachment. More information can be found here:

http://teacher.scholastic.com/professional/bruceperry/attachment.htm

http://www.circleofsecurity.org/index.html

Note: Attachment theory, while similar to, is different from attachment parenting. That’s another post for another day.

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